First of all if you haven’t read my blog about my call to ministry, I encourage you to as it sets the stage for this one. COME AGAIN?
This Saturday 3 years ago I was in a packed down car traveling to the place that would soon become my Home. Within the first 24 hours of arriving, I knew without a doubt that it was the place for me. God began to develop friendships that still remain with me today. This summer as I had prepared for my senior year there I had been overwhelmed with excitement and sadness at the thought of it being my last! Last month after surrendering to the call of full time ministry, my plan was to finish Milligan and see if God opened the door for ministry or seminary or both.
However as the beginning of the semester approached I felt God was perhaps calling me to a different journey and a different path. My prayer began to be, “God, show me Your will for this year. I only want to be where You want me to be.” But as I prayed this prayer I realized that it was not God who was being unclear, but Brandy who was trying to filter His guidance. God’s Word promises that He will be clear with us:
“You make known to me the path of life; in Your presence there is fullness of joy; at Your right hand are pleasures forevermore.” – Psalm 16.11
So my prayer began to be: “God continue to be clear with me and open my mind to hear You and my heart to accept what You have to say.”
I don’t know how to explain it really. If you’ve ever been in a situation where God was telling you to do something that doesn’t line up logically then you know what I mean. I had this unsettling feeling everytime I prayed about it. Even as I went on the cheer camp with the squad, I felt it the whole weekend. I simply knew that Milligan wasn’t the place that God desired for me to be this year. This doesn’t make much sense to my in my tiny human mind, as I am only a year away from completing a Nursing degree and have put in countless hours to get this far. However I fully believe God when He says in Isaiah 55: “For my thoughts are not your thoughts; neither are your ways my ways. For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts higher than your thoughts.”
I am trusting that God sees the big picture.
Many people are not satisfied with this answer and feel I am making a mistake. I understand their concern and know they only want what is best for me but I assure you that the Master of the Universe has whats best for me in mind (Romans 8.28)(Jeremiah 29.11). While I appreciate everyone’s opinions and concerns, I am choosing to live by these two verses when disapproval arrises:
Galatians 1.10: “For am I now seeking the approval of man or of God? Or am I trying to please man? If I were still trying to please man, I would not be a servant of Christ.”
1 Corinthians 2.5: “That your faith might not rest in the wisdom of men but in the power of God.”
I am very sad to be leaving Milligan. To those of you who I have met along the way, you will never know the impact you have had and will continue to have on my life. I tell people all the time that I am blessed with the best group of friends anyone could ask for! This community has meant so much to me and I hope we can all remain in contact and that you will all know how much I treasure you.
So what is next you ask? Well I am transferring to Liberty Online and pursing a Bachelor’s in Religion with a minor in Christian Couseling. I have chosen this route because now wherever the Lord leads me, I can go without being tied down to location. I am visiting a church in Delaware next weekend that planted early in the year to pray about joining them in their mission to reach the lost and passionately serve the Lord. And pretty much I am waiting on God to open doors and reveal to me in His timing where He wants me to spend this coming year. I know I am planted in Honaker until at least October as I am leading the girl’s portion of the True Love Waits study for our youth the month of September. And as of Thursday I started working at a Christian daycare here at home! While it is sad to close the door on my journey at Milligan, I am very excited for whatever it is that God is about to do in and through my life! I simply want to fullfill the “life God has called me to” (1 Cor. 7.17), whatever it is that may be.
For my brothers and sisters in Christ, I ask two things: 1. pray that I will recklessly abandon my wishes and follow the plan God has for me and 2. seek what it is in your life that the Lord is asking you to surrender. Back in February my youth group back home did the Francis Chans study surrender. At the end of each lesson, we would all write things we felt God was asking us to surrender on a white flag. The last lesson was “surrendering self” and the end we nailed our white flags to a cross to symbolize our surrender. Here is a picture of the list I wrote the last night:
God was stirring in my heart then for me to be willing to surrender my EVERYTHING and my LIFE which are the bottom two you can’t read. Maybe for you He is asking you to surrender a hobby, a relationship, a sin, time out of your day, or maybe He is asking you to surrender your occupation, your dreams, and the future you’ve had planned for so long. Whatever it is don’t be afraid! I have a peace I have never felt before and an excitement that I can’t contain! I feel like my life is just now beginning and am thrilled for what is in store!
I leave you with two passages that have become my prayers:
“For YOU are great and do wondrous things; YOU alone are God. Teach me YOUR way, O Lord, that I many walk in YOUR truth; unite my heart to fear YOUR name. I give thanks to YOU, O Lord my God, with my whole heart, and I will glorify YOUR name forever.” -Psalm 86.10-12
“Let me hear in the morning of Your steadfast love, for in You I trust. Make me know the way I should god, for to Your I lift up my soul. … Teach me to do Your will, for You are my God! Let Your good Spirit lead me on level ground!” – Psalm 143. 8 & 10