Getting married… but not consumed… August 15, 2013

Well the big news is now public…….. I’M GETTING MARRIED… I’m going to be Mrs. Joel Miller. I’m going to be doing a blog series soon of how the Lord sent this wonderful, godly man into my life! But for now… I want to share something Jesus spoke into my heart yesterday.

See we’ve decided to get married on October 26… this year…. yes, I’m well aware that it is only 2.5 months away… and I’m well aware that most people spend a year planning a wedding. But we don’t want to wait! We’ve been waiting on each other and praying for each other for many many years. We’ve prayed about this and are certain that this is God’s plan for us right now. With that being said… I’ve been a busy girl these last 7 days… With only 73 days left before our wedding, my to do list is endless… but I needed to take a few minutes to share this.

You see Joel and I have made a rule that one evening a week we will have date night and there will be no wedding planning. This is simply because we don’t want to be “consumed” by the wedding. We still want to develop our relationship with each other and spend time preparing for marriage not just the wedding.

Not getting consumed is kind of hard though…. I mean with a wedding right around the corner, it’s so easy to spend all my spare time planning and all my drive time day dreaming. It’s so easy to get caught up in the excitement and wonder of what marriage is going to be like. I can so quickly find myself completely distracted from my tasks at hand and lost in thoughts of lace and burlap and pearls.

The last couple of days the word “consume” has been continually on  my mind. So do I attempt to not be consumed with the wedding so I can be consumed with our relationship? Or do I not be consumed with our relationship so I can be consumed with work? I’m starting my workout program back up this week but the comment I made is “I don’t want to get consumed with it like I did in March.” But yesterday I could just hear Jesus drawing me back saying “Why would you want to be consumed with anything but Me?”

Consume: to engage fully.

I don’t want to be consumed with anything or anyone besides Jesus! I don’t want to think about anything more than Jesus. Love anything more that Jesus. Dwell on anything more than Jesus. Look forward to anything more than Jesus. Cling to anything more than Jesus. Find enjoyment in anything more than Jesus…. Even in this busy time where I’m on cloud 9 and Jesus is pouring out blessing after blessing… I want to be consumed with HIM! His love. His plan. His thoughts. His perspective. His character. His beauty. His grace. Himself!

“Whom have I in heaven but You? And there is nothing on earth that I desire besides You.” – Psalm 73.25

I am so so blessed in life right now. I praise God for sending me such an amazing man who pursues me and loves me and leads me the way Joel does. I am in awe of what God is doing in our lives right now. In that, I always want to remember that where my blessings come from and never fail to praise Him for all that He is and all that He’s doing!

I’m praying that regardless where you are in life you will choose to only be consumed with Christ… Maybe you struggle with being consumed by work, ministry, children, struggles, finances, happiness, relationships, school, fitness, popularity, success… I don’t know what you tend to be consumed with… I find so much more joy when I’m consumed with the One who loves me more than I can imagine.

Brandy 🙂

 

Reflecting on what could have been and rejoicing in what is… May 11, 2013

Jesus is clear that there is a cost to following Him… He doesn’t sugar coat it and tell you that you can have all of your dreams and this perfect life and follow Him.
Luke 14.26-27: “If anyone comes to Me and does not hate his own father and mother and wife and children and brothers and sisters, yes and even his own life, he cannot be My disciple. Whoever does not bear his own cross and come after Me cannot be My disciple.”
Is the Jesus who comes preaching LOVE telling us to actually hate those closest to us? NO. He’s saying that even the dearest people in our lives, those who we treasure the most should pale in comparison to our adoration for Christ. Our love for them should look like hate in comparison to our love for Jesus.
It’s hard truth but it’s truth… Here’s another tough pill to swallow…
Luke 14.33: “So therefore, any one of you who does not renounce all that he has cannot be my disciple.”
We have to be willing to give up anything for the sake of Christ. We have to recognize the cost…
Is my life mainly great? ABSOLUTELY! Is there ever a day I regret my decision to follow Christ’s leading to DE? NO NOT ONE. But I feel it’s also important to recognize the cost…
Sometimes the cost comes for me in telling my family goodbye after a visit or having my grandpa say “when are you coming home again?”
Sometimes it comes in missing my friends and feeling like I don’t have time to connect with them…
Sometimes it comes in the frustration of trying to balance my life…
Sometimes it comes in missing my old church family and the youth kids there….
But this past week the cost came first in missing my sister’s junior prom (not being there to get her ready, do her make-up, have my picture made with her, watch her ride off with her charming date)…
And secondly the cost came in this realization…. If I had stuck to my 10 year plan, I would be graduating with all my friends from Milligan College this weekend with my BSN.
This week as I watched status after status about finishing undergrad, pinning, and graduation… my mind couldn’t help but wander… What would my life have been like if I would have never surrendered to this crazy adventure? I would be walking across a stage this weekend with diploma in hand and celebrating with my awesome friends that we had finally made it…
Oh but what I would have missed out on……..
Check this out: Luke 9.23-25… Jesus said “If anyone would come after me, let him deny himself and take up his cross daily and follow me.” {but the great part is that it doesn’t end there} He continues, “For whoever would save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for my sake will save it. For what does it profit a man if he gains the whole world and loses or forfeits himself?”
I could have clinched so tightly for one my year to my life (nursing school, close friendships, being near my family, serving at my home church) but oh the life I would have missed. I would have missed this journey… this new intimacy with God… the joy of being in His perfect will… the fullness of life that only comes in losing ourselves (our dreams, our comforts) for His sake.
The truth is this … there is a cost… following where God wants you to be will never come without a price… BUT the price is never more than the reward!
Would it be nice to be close to my family, celebrating graduation with my friends, still serving in my home church? Absolutely… but even with counting the cost, I wouldn’t trade for one second being where God wants me to be here I Delaware… I wouldn’t do this past year any differently.

So what’s happening now? God’s opening doors! Great ones! It looks like I’m going to be staying in Delaware for a while! I am still working with the church and I had been picking up 1-2 days a week of babysitting on the side. But as of yesterday a new sweet baby girl named Katherine Finn was born and I will now be her part time nanny in addition to my role at the church! I’m so excited for this new part of my Delaware adventure. God is so good and I’m so humbled that He sent me here, that He’s using me. It blows my mind every day!

For my Milligan friends reading this… CONGRATULATIONS! I’m so happy for you all and so proud of your perseverance!

To those of you who have kept up and been praying me through this journey or supported me in any way… THANK YOU! I couldn’t do this without you all!

For any of you reading this… don’t be afraid to let go of anything that God is calling you to renounce… My overused phrase that I’ve found so much truth in is this…
You will never ever surrender something to God’s control and regret it later!

Happy Valentine’s Day! February 14, 2013

As I scroll through my news feed on Facebook this morning most everyone falls into three catagories. People who are happy, people who are upset, people who are upset but are trying to convince the world that they are happy. Notice I didn’t classify them as single or taken. Gifted or giftless. A holiday such as this was meant to celebrate LOVE… not evny or pride. Many people today are insisting that they have “the best”, some share with us pictures of gifts and stories about their love, and many single people are complaining……. Singles, I get it! I used to dread this day of everyone getting flowers and enjoying a romantic love that I had yet to experience. With that being said, in the last few years God has really changed my heart about this day. We have experienced love! We’ve experienced the all-surpassing love of Jesus Christ that is more than enough to satisfy all of our needs! We should also celebrate with our brothers and sisters in Christ. I love hearing all the stories and seeing the sweet ways people express their love to each other. I love it because when two godly people express their love, it glorifies our God! I also love it because I have hope that one day I will have a story to share, a story that I hope screams the gospel of Jesus Christ, a story that I hope others will read and enjoy without being so miserable that they can’t enjoy it. So maybe this Valentine’s your life isn’t where you would want it to be. Maybe you’re still waiting on God to send a special someone into your life, or maybe you’ve found that person but you aren’t married yet, or maybe you’re married and your special someone didn’t express their love the way you would have preferred. Whatever the case my encouragement to you is that today… Celebrate LOVE! The love Christ has for you, the love you have for family and friends, and the love of those around you! 🙂

Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resenful; it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all thing. Love never ends. (1 Corinthians 13.4-8)

“Like a fruit picked green or a flower plucked before it blossoms, our attempts to rush God’s timing can spoil the beauty of His plan for our lives.” – Joshua Harris

Lessons from 21 and on to 22 October 10, 2012

Well as many of you know this has been a very eventful and life changing year! I am at a place in my life that I would have never dreamed up a year ago! God has taught me many things throughout this year but there are few that stand out the most!

1st: Life is not about me! It’s about JESUS!
Believe it or not we as humans were not created to be happy. We were not created to make the most money, have the most beautiful love story, or get the highest degree attainable. We were created for one purpose: to glorify the Lord! (Isaiah 43.7: “everyone who is called by my name, whom I created for my glory, whom I formed and made.”) The Bible doesn’t leave open for debate but is very clear. Now with that being said, there is joy and satisfaction and fulfillment in doing what we were made to do. I like to put it this way, if you seek happiness, you will not find it, but if you seek the Lord you will find JOY and joy is not limited to circumstances!

2nd: For Him to be 1st I must be 2nd!
We can not put ourselves before God and still make Him 1st. For years I have “tried” to make God first but it wasn’t til this year that God finally opened my eyes to show me that I had been putting my wants, goals, and dreams above His. Jesus is clear that we must deny oursleves. (Mark 8.34-35 “If anyone would come after me, let him DENY himself and take up his cross and follow me. For whoever would save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for my sake and the gospels will save it.”)
Deny: to refuse to grant, to restrain from gratification of desires.
We also are called to put Jesus before our responsibilities and expectations. Sometimes it’s easier for me to put Him before my wants than to put Him before my expecations. In Luke 9, there is a man who wanted to follow Jesus but bury his father first and another who wants to say farewell to their family first but Jesus says in v.62 “No one who puts his hand to the plow and looks back is fit for the kingdom of God.” I don’t think Jesus meant this out of disrespect to family. It is obvious is all of the Bible’s teachings that family is of high importance but Jesus was showing that HE is more important than family, responsibilities, and expectations. Putting Him 1st is still something I am striving to learn each and every day. I know it is only by His strength and his grace that I can do anything that gives Him glory. (2 Cor. 3.5)

3rd: Often times the path God has for us does not match what culture expects as goals or success.
Do not get me wrong, I think God has plans for people to have all different occupations and I by no means think I have to be in full time ministry to glorify the Lord. I do believe though that God desires for us to be different and set apart. Sometimes that means we will not get the degree that is expected of us or pursue the career that seems the most successful! It will often go against the flow of what everyone else is doing! (Matt. 7.13-14: “Enter by the narrow gate. For the gate is wide and the way is easy that leads to destruction, and those who enter by it are many. For the gate is narrow and the way is hard that leads to life, and those who find it are few!”)

So what’s the plan for 22??? On this new journey God is taking me on, I want to spend every day seeking to make my life about Christ and put HIM first instead of me knowing that most of the time this will not be pleasing to the world we live in! I don’t have the strenght to do this on my own but I also know that “I can do all things through Christ who strenghtens me!”- Phil 4.13

With that my theme verse for the year of 22 is going to be Galatians 2.20 “I have been crucified with Christ. It is no longer I who live, but Christ who lives in me. And the life I now live in the flesh I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave Himself for me!”

From VA to DE September 1, 2012

I can remember from the time I was young always feeling a tugging to do something crazy! I can remember reading books like Crazy Love and When God Writes Your Life Story and hearing song like “I Will Follow” and feeling almost uncomfortable. I would often pray things like “God I know You call people to step out of their comfort zones but I’m doing work for You in my comfort zone, so why leave?” But after God opened my eyes to His call for my life in July, many of my prayers have been, “God, I want to be in the place where it is that You get the most Glory from my life.” and “God, I don’t want to just be used, I want to be used up!” and “God, I don’t know where You want me but I know that where You want me is better than where I want me.”

Well the last two months ago have been nothing but an adventure! Two months ago on July 1st all of my conversations were filled with excitement as I prepared to leave for Powerlife 2012 that week on the 5th! Looking back, I can’t believe how much my life has changed since then! While at Powerlife my call to ministry was clear and God prepared my heart for the surrender that was ahead. Within a week of returning home God started opening my eyes, showing me that my senior year at Milligan was not His plan, but mine. To read these two steps of the journey see COME AGAIN?! and FUTURE PLANS…

So where did Delaware come from? Well the week I retruned from Powerlife, in the midst of struggling with my Milligan plans, I received a facebook message from Tammy Lashey.{ A little history: I know Tammy because she sings with the group Calling Levi which is made up of her, her husband, her sister, and her sister’s husband. They have been part of Powerlife since before I started attending and our church also got linked up with them there. I got to know all of them personally when they started visiting our church 5 years ago and we would have cookouts with them on the saturday before they sang. This relationship with these awesome people continued to develop as I became part of the Powerlife staff last year. Over a year ago, Mark (Tammy’s husband) realized God’s call for him to be a pastor and that’s when I first heard of LIFEHOUSE. At the time LIFEHOUSE was a bible study that was held at Tammy and Mark’s house. In Febuary of this year, LIFEHOUSE planted as a church with Sunday worship and Tuesday bible study. } So this facebook message was simply an invite to come and visit LIFEHOUSE and pray about partnering with them if God was drawing me. My heart immediately filled with excitement at the possibility! But the more I tossed this idea around in my head, I thought “No way! Moving to Delaware would be CRAZY!”

As we chatted back and forth, plans came together for me and my friend Joy to travel up together and see what God was doing! Last weekend we made the 9 hour trip to Delaware and from the first moment, I just knew. As I heard the testimonies and the way God was moving my heart was overflowing with joy and for the first time since surrendering to the ministry, I had a vision for what this year could look like. Our visit was truly incredible! We were greeted by amazing people that immediately felt like family. When Sunday came, we got to begin worshipping, serving, and growing with this body of believers. After returning, I spent a couple days praying just to confirm that this was God’s desire and not just mine and was overwhelmed with peace and joy that only comes from God!

For those of you who know me well, you are probably surprised that I did not return to Milligan and am moving to Delaware. But for those of you who don’t know me that well, I’ll tell you a few of the reasons I SHOULDN’T move to Delaware:
1. I am NOT sponatneous or adventurous! I have practically had my entire life planned out since I was 15. NO JOKE! When I came into college I had a 10 year plan, and I can assure you that ministry, Liberty Online, or Delaware wasn’t part of it!
2. I am a homebody! I LOVE being at home. For 3 years I lived at Milligan and almost every single weekend I drove 2 hrs home and 2 hrs back just to be with my family and my church! I have amazing friends here in Honaker and am very close to my family and church family.
3. I am from small town Honaker, VA. People don’t usually leave here. You just don’t. Out of the 97 people in my graduating class, 8 of us left home and went off to school. It’s a great small down where generation after generation stays.
4. God is using me right here! God has given me several opportunities right here where I am from working with the youth in my church to the kids in my church. As a Christian I believe God can use you anywhere.

All this being said, WHY am I moving to Delaware!?
1. God is calling me there! All of these other reasons are great but even if they weren’t present, I would be going! The most important thing for me is to be in the center of God’s Will for my life doing exactly what He designed me to do! John 10.27 “My sheep hear my voice and I know them and they follow me.”
2. God is doing awesome things in Delaware! People’s lives are being changed by the gospel! This is an area where not everyone knows the gospel but the few that do are changed forever! This church planted in February and had 393 in attendance last sunday when I was there! God is moving and I want to be a part!
3. There is a need! Of those 393 over 140 of them are 6th grade kids and under! God is flooding this church with His glory and they need people to SERVE!
4. God has been preparing me for this for years! It is no coincidence to me that God would send me to Delaware with the families of Calling Levi. I have been close with them for 5 years! My family knows them and my church knows them! I have been praying for LIFEHOUSE for about 2 years now with no idea I would be moving there! 2 Corinthians 3.5 “Not  that we are adequate in ourselves to conside anything as coming from ourselves, but our adequacy is from God.”

I am so humbled to think God would call me to become a part of this awesome ministry! God has truly blessed me! Through a grant with the North American Mission Board, I am going to be able to be a part time ministry intern with this church and am committed for a year. Not only is He sending me there He is sending two of my dearest friends from Powerlife as well! I am more excited about this than any opportunity I have ever had!

I am so excited for this new journey God is taking me on and I pray that you all will pray that God will move and use me!
Psalm 16.11 “You make known to me the path of life; in Your presence there is fullness of joy; at Your right hand there are pleasures forevermore!”

The verse LIFEHOUSE is named from is John 10.10: “I came that they may have life and life abundantly!”

To check out the church you can visit http://www.lifehousede.com/.
If you feel led to help support me or want to ask questions about supporting me, you can email me at brandycaudill90@gmail.com

 

Future Plans…. or lack thereof! August 18, 2012

First of all if you haven’t read my blog about my call to ministry, I encourage you to as it sets the stage for this one. COME AGAIN?

This Saturday 3 years ago I was in a packed down car traveling to the place that would soon become my Home. Within the first 24 hours of arriving, I knew without a doubt that it was the place for me. God began to develop friendships that still remain with me today. This summer as I had prepared for my senior year there I had been overwhelmed with excitement and sadness at the thought of it being my last! Last month after surrendering to the call of full time ministry, my plan was to finish Milligan and see if God opened the door for ministry or seminary or both.

However as the beginning of the semester approached I felt God was perhaps calling me to a different journey and a different path. My prayer began to be, “God, show me Your will for this year. I only want to be where You want me to be.” But as I prayed this prayer I realized that it was not God who was being unclear, but Brandy who was trying to filter His guidance. God’s Word promises that He will be clear with us:
“You make known to me the path of life;  in Your presence there is fullness of joy; at Your right hand are pleasures forevermore.” – Psalm 16.11
So my prayer began to be: “God continue to be clear with me and open my mind to hear You and my heart to accept what You have to say.”

I don’t know how to explain it really. If you’ve ever been in a situation where God was telling you to do something that doesn’t line up logically then you know what I mean. I had this unsettling feeling everytime I prayed about it. Even as I went on the cheer camp with the squad, I felt it the whole weekend. I simply knew that Milligan wasn’t the place that God desired for me to be this year. This doesn’t make much sense to my in my tiny human mind, as I am only a year away from completing a Nursing degree and have put in countless hours to get this far. However I fully believe God when He says in Isaiah 55: “For my thoughts are not your thoughts; neither are your ways my ways. For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts higher than your thoughts.”
I am trusting that God sees the big picture.

Many people are not satisfied with this answer and feel I am making a mistake. I understand their concern and know they only want what is best for me but I assure you that the Master of the Universe has whats best for me in mind (Romans 8.28)(Jeremiah 29.11). While I appreciate everyone’s opinions and concerns, I am choosing to live by these two verses when disapproval arrises:
Galatians 1.10: “For am I now seeking the approval of man or of God?  Or am I trying to please man? If I were still trying to please man, I would not be a servant of Christ.”
1 Corinthians 2.5: “That your faith might not rest in the wisdom of men but in the power of God.”

I am very sad to be leaving Milligan. To those of you who I have met along the way, you will never know the impact you have had and will continue to have on my life. I tell people all the time that I am blessed with the best group of friends anyone could ask for! This community has meant so much to me and I hope we can all remain in contact and that you will all know how much I treasure you.

So what is next you ask? Well I am transferring to Liberty Online and pursing a Bachelor’s in Religion with a minor in Christian Couseling. I have chosen this route because now wherever the Lord leads me, I can go without being tied down to location. I am visiting a church in Delaware next weekend that planted early in the year to pray about joining them in their mission to reach the lost and passionately serve the Lord. And pretty much I am waiting on God to open doors and reveal to me in His timing where He wants me to spend this coming year. I know I am planted in Honaker until at least October as I am leading the girl’s portion of the True Love Waits study for our youth the month of September. And as of Thursday I started working at a Christian daycare here at home! While it is sad to close the door on my journey at Milligan, I am very excited for whatever it is that God is about to do in and through my life! I simply want to fullfill the “life God has called me to” (1 Cor. 7.17), whatever it is that may be.

For my brothers and sisters in Christ, I ask two things: 1. pray that I will recklessly abandon my wishes and follow the plan God has for me and 2. seek what it is in your life that the Lord is asking you to surrender. Back in February my youth group back home did the Francis Chans study surrender. At the end of each lesson, we would all write things we felt God was asking us to surrender on a white flag. The last lesson was “surrendering self” and the end we nailed our white flags to a cross to symbolize our surrender. Here is a picture of the list I wrote the last night:

God was stirring in my heart then for me to be willing to surrender my EVERYTHING and my LIFE which are the bottom two you can’t read. Maybe for you He is asking you to surrender a hobby, a relationship, a sin, time out of your day, or maybe He is asking you to surrender your occupation, your dreams, and the future you’ve had planned for so long. Whatever it is don’t be afraid! I have a peace I have never felt before and an excitement that I can’t contain! I feel like my life is just now beginning and am thrilled for what is in store!

I leave you with two passages that have become my prayers:

“For YOU are great and do wondrous things; YOU alone are God. Teach me YOUR way, O Lord, that I many walk in YOUR truth; unite my heart to fear YOUR name. I give thanks to YOU, O Lord my God, with my whole heart, and I will glorify YOUR name forever.” -Psalm 86.10-12

“Let me hear in the morning of Your steadfast love, for in You I trust. Make me know the way I should god, for to Your I lift up my soul. … Teach me to do Your will, for You are my God! Let Your good Spirit lead me on level ground!” – Psalm 143. 8 & 10